Our deepest desires

"Time goes by very quickly," writes one my most favorite inspirators, Thich Nhat Hanh, "one day we may be surprised to discover our life is nearing its end, and we don’t know what we’ve done with all the time we’ve lived. Maybe we’ve wasted entire days in anger, fear, and jealousy. We rarely offer ourselves the time and space to consider: Am I doing what I most want to be doing with my life? Do I even know what that is? The noise in our heads and all around us drowns out the “still, small voice” inside. We are so busy doing “something” that we rarely take a moment to look deeply and check in with our deepest desires."

This quote seems to be very relevant to my stage of life. What are my deepest desires? What do I really want?

I remember how in 1986, during my "spiritual trip" to India, when I spent a couple of weeks in Haidakhan Babaji's ashrams and felt really close "to the Absolute," there was a desire in me to stay there for the rest of my life. However, I was a "young father" at that time (my sons being 2 year and a few months old), and this choice seemed "unthinkable." I knew my DUTY was to go back and to be there for my wife and children.

Although deep in myself I still experience some sort of "calling," I am not quite sure if "meditating in the Himalayas" is still a thing for me. Mine seems to be the path of "householder" - common, unimpressive, obscure. Part of the difficulty with this world, Haidakhan Babaji maintained, is that "no one wants to be small." Everybody wants to be reach, famous, popular in the media, in one way or another, "exceptional."

Though my sons are grown now, and they do not need me the same way like 30 years ago, they still, nevertheless, whether they are aware of it or not, NEED ME. So applies to my wife, the rest of my family, and perhaps even my friends. I have a sense of duty toward all of them. "Fulfilling your duty," Babaji says, "is the highest accomplishment; higher than other sadhana, penance, and the rest." I think I will stick to my duty.

At the same time, Babaji proclaimed that "service to humanity is the highest duty." I feel a duty, even obligation, to share what I have learned over the course of my life. It may be of some use for someone. This is one of the reasons why I decided to start this blog. It is also a way to make this "still, small voice" inside of me a bit louder.

(PR)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

On the Death of the Immortal.

"Selling air" - A tribute to Leonard Orr

The people have spoken ...